Thursday, July 13, 2006

The Empress Dowager


"ok...auntie listen...u just come and visit..see for yourself..it's booming! Also it's reported recently they are spending US$4 billion a week for building material and equipment!..we can start a small hardware shop...maybe about 5,000 sq feet"

She was silent for a while..and rubbing her palms together...then a slight smile

"well..i dont grow money on tree! u painted a rosy picture..Anyway,I might consider going for a holiday first.You know me...clean sheets and towels everyday..very important..evian everyday..my regular spa and wine..."

"Not a problem...I can arrange a good service apartment..plan a free and easy itinerary..and also arrange for u to meet some business people as well as the local sponsors."

Auntie Alexis (Not her real name..) in her 50s...is single and a successful businesswoman back home. She manages a 30,000 sq ft furniture mall space. The rental from the landlord is about $3 per sq ft..she charges the sub tenants at $5 per sq ft. So..go figure out what she's getting per month for this particular business. For her age....she really looks good...no face lift or botox...just vigorous exercise at the California Fitness and regular dosages of human placenta! (from Japan)Earlier, she wanted to explore the idea of bringing the product (placenta) to Dubai. Im not so sure whether the authority allows that..
"Anyway...I heard the arab men are very hum sup (cantonese for lecherous)?"

"Not true auntie...here in Dubai...they are very professional and mind their own business"

"And don't expect me to be wrapped up from head to toes like a ninja ok?"

I smiled.

She and her entourage of five tai tai (woman of wealth and leisure) are planning to visit on the 2nd week of August...

"Fasten your seat belt..it's going to be a bumpy ride!"
uttered Margo..the dwindling diva from the classic: All About Eve


Any professional kinapper(s) out there? Please contact me.

21 Comments:

Blogger Tainted Female said...

Ohh be quiet you! She sounds like an interesting woman who probably has lots of interesting stories to tell...

eating placenta?!

12:53 PM

 
Blogger Cergie said...

She is perhaps rich but she looks like an old dry mummy instead her wonderful desses !

1:14 PM

 
Blogger moviemania said...

I'd like to meet her, she does sound interesting! :P

Thanks for commenting on my blog :D I haven't been on in a while or I would have commented on yours earlier :)

9:00 PM

 
Blogger halfmanhalfbeer said...

Loved the post, and your use of hum sup and tai-tai brought some memories flooding back. I spent ten years in HK and a few in Singapore, it's good to "hear" some cantonese again!

HMHB

3:10 PM

 
Blogger San Nakji said...

Let's just stop at placenta shall we? Have you seen a fresh one closeup? :O(

5:08 AM

 
Blogger black feline said...

your highness...she is the real dragon lady! placenta (human or animal) is BIG biz in asia...the cheapest form is in tablet/capsule form..otherwise a simple jab which lasts for 2 weeks (looking younger) costs about US$150!
cergie...lol...that figure shown was the infamous Empress Cixi of China...in the grave for more than a century!
moviemania...she's interesting YES...but nasty at the same time...lol
halfmanhalfbeer...watch the belly otherwise the tai tai will not be happy with a "fei lo"
nakji...only in capsule form..will be interesting to see a fresh one in your next posting...lol

6:05 AM

 
Blogger San Nakji said...

I didn't think to take photos... It kind of looks like a jellyfish, but more blood!

2:00 AM

 
Blogger San Nakji said...

Here we go... not for the faint hearted! http://www.humpath.com/IMG/jpg/partial_circumvallate_placenta_06-2.jpg

2:01 AM

 
Blogger junebee said...

Wow, you can write some posts about her visit! Maybe post a pic of the placenta pills too.

I thought tai-tai was Chinese for "Wife", a wife of any social standing or age.

5:02 AM

 
Anonymous surprised sheep said...

Do Police officers in Dubai accept “Bribes” ?

Apparently, YES!

So this friend of ours was in a taxi being driven down to Sharjah, the cab guy skips a light at the Galadhari cross roads and changes three lanes in a go. The cab got pulled over and the Cops came over and wanted to arrest this guy. Not the Driver, but the passenger,(Brown passenger).

The cops asked him if he was drinking, (remember he was not in Sharjah yet, still a few hundred meters away from the border),


The guy freaked out so he offers a bribe, AED 1,800 that he happened to have in his pocket. And guess what, the Uniformed Dubai Police Officer accepts it and lets him go.
Now we understand that corruption is endemic in this region, however is it acceptable to fleece the underprivileged? Oh allk right this over paid brown guy we are taling about is not part of the ,”underprivileged”, but WTF? Well Dubai is progressing and ……

Dubai = a wanna be First world country?

Dubai = stereotypical Arab nation with nothing new to offer.


Regards,

Surprised Sheep Productions

2:31 AM

 
Anonymous surprised sheep said...

Do Police officers in Dubai accept “Bribes” ?

Apparently, YES!

So this friend of ours was in a taxi being driven down to Sharjah, the cab guy skips a light at the Galadhari cross roads and changes three lanes in a go. The cab got pulled over and the Cops came over and wanted to arrest this guy. Not the Driver, but the passenger,(Brown passenger).

The cops asked him if he was drinking, (remember he was not in Sharjah yet, still a few hundred meters away from the border),


The guy freaked out so he offers a bribe, AED 1,800 that he happened to have in his pocket. And guess what, the Uniformed Dubai Police Officer accepts it and lets him go.
Now we understand that corruption is endemic in this region, however is it acceptable to fleece the underprivileged? Oh allk right this over paid brown guy we are taling about is not part of the ,”underprivileged”, but WTF? Well Dubai is progressing and ……

Dubai = a wanna be First world country?

Dubai = stereotypical Arab nation with nothing new to offer.


Regards,

Surprised Sheep Productions

2:32 AM

 
Blogger San Nakji said...

They also accept bribes in Australia... What's your take on that SSP?

4:16 AM

 
Blogger black feline said...

nakji...that's ghastly!But it makes MONEY!!!!!
Junebee...u are right...however nowadays...when u address a lady as Tai Tai..especially in Hong Kong, Singapore, Taiwan...etc it also means in a mocking way....she has married a wealthy man...need not work..enjoy life day in day out...high tea, shopping, keeping up appearances...etc
surprised sheep...thanks for dropping by BUT I am a bit surprised by all these bribery thing here..for this particular post?????? a bit puzzling for me..what's your agenda? In any case..there's bribery even in squeaky clean Singapore...
"The guy freaked out so he offers a bribe, AED 1,800 that he happened to have in his pocket. And guess what, the Uniformed Dubai Police Officer accepts it and lets him go." Was it an entrapment? did the police asked for money in the first instance?
By the way...can my dear auntie has a bit of limelight here instead? :)

5:38 AM

 
Blogger Ruben said...

The odd thing is that after a night of heavy drinking I resemble the person in that painting. LOL

4:35 AM

 
Blogger Balushi said...

i would love to have sex with her

10:59 AM

 
Blogger black feline said...

really ruben? u sure it's not the person next to u? lol
buluchi...u are not only mad..u are also a pervert!Hope u die a thousand death..lol

4:33 PM

 
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