Friday, December 30, 2005

The Blogedemy Awards 2005 Part 01

(source of photo: desertbuzz of flickr)
You have the Oscar, Grammy, for a little year end fun..I'm giving my take on the 10 bloggers that made my list of bloggerlicious people. My criteria is simple: interesting, addictive and touches the heart. Btw I do not know them personally.
(Not in order)
- She's definitely a well travelled person..believes in living life to the fullest.Interesting tales.. excellent in details without being overbearing. She called herself "a collector of life experiences"
- A language teacher putting in so much efforts to write about buildings/projects in Dubai..highly commendable..really it's believable! The Developers should engage him as their publicity spokeperson.
- Full of life's simple pleasures..this blog is like a cup of green tea..very refreshing. Another good reason to like it..many fond memories of my stay in Vietnam.
Highly recommended for those who want to understand the Middle East. I don't want to sound patronising but the author gives a balanced view of all things middle it political, cultural, religious..etc
In his own words:The reason was my disappointment of what I used to read about what and how the Middle East is represented to the world online. It was (and maybe still) an image drawn with black painting on a black background. I felt that I have a duty to do. At least try to erase one line from that dark painting and replace it with a white one that represent some of the unknown shiny facts about this part of the world.
This guy is not writing a blog but a BOOK! english teacher in's one of those stories..once u have it in your's quite unstoppable!Absolutely no ranting..a winner all the way!..put a smile on your face!

Will give u the next 5 soon...HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006!

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

"Something light...Please!!!!"

The plead came from a friend on Boxing Day. I smiled..for two straight days/nights, he was feasting like a stuffed turkey. I reminded him wickedly the New Year is just around the frowned.
Imagine eleven months of regimental routine...eating right, regular exercising..etc to maintain a nice bod with at least 4 packs...all thrown out the window within a week. As for me, it is no secret, I eat like a rabbit and furthermore Im not much a meat person.. by choice (lots of veggies, fruits, steamed fish and chicken)..therefore I do not have problem at all...mainly because I don't fancy such goodies..well..maybe just a bit..but logcake or what have definitely no no.
The weather in Dubai is extremely hot..the appetite is normally not there...drink lots of light..the Mediterranean diet is the best..olive oil, vegs salad, grilled salmon or tuna..with a dash of seasalt, black pepper..a glass of orange juice..voila! u have a perfect meal! My colleagues, most of them, will get sick at least once every 3 weeks. Frankly, not me since DAY 01 in Dubai..not even a sneeze!
shhhhhhh...tell u a little secret..they love my salad..there must be a big bowl for every dinner!

Saturday, December 24, 2005

10 ways to skin a ranting blogger Part 02

I heard from my great aunt that if u rant too much...the bad energy generated will stay in your system for a long time..and will eventually cause premature ageing in babies. Anyway...the next 5 choices for ridding bad karma:
6. Spitting is not a phenomena in get over it. Whether u are from high or low society....everybody spit...stop ranting as if those foreign labourers have committed a sacrilege. The council strongly recommends u spend the next 10 days chewing betal nuts in your little cubicle...and u are allowed to spit into your palstic bin and nowhere else..alternatively u may swallow the bloody red juice in your mouth.
7. You are always complaining of bad services by pinoy salespeople in the retail industry. Perhaps u are a demanding customer...OR u probably know the finest art of good service. In that case, u shall be attached to Carrefour/payment counter at Bur Dubai for one full day..specifically end of month payday...workers from India, Pakistan, Bangladesh..etc will love to shake your hands and drown u with their requests for more plastic bags.
8.Any announcement of a new mega mall coming up in Dubai causes your head to spin..u hate development...u will rant and mock as if it's going to make any difference.Since you belong to the earth..that's where we are sending u..THE DESERT SAFARI!..and u will be stranded for 24 hrs because your 4 wheels drive got stuck in the dunes.
9. You cannot take the smell anymore.. stinking odour of people around u..u threatened to pack up.. go home to your perfumed country. Well, we think u have problem with your nose..we are sending u, all expenses Dubai Cosmetic $ Plastic surgery Centre..they are good for nose re-shaping as well.
10. The above(1-9) is only applicable to those who have ranted more than 128 times..otherwise u are safe for now.


Thursday, December 22, 2005

10 ways to skin a ranting blogger Part 01

It is confirmed. You will not receive any gifts from me this Christmas nor will u be invited to our Christmas bash. Why u may ask? The simple reason is because u like to rant over every trivial matters..u are a risk to world peace. Hopefully, for year have inspiring things to say. In the meantime...choose any of the followings to purge yourself of the bad karma.
1. You are probably stuck in your armchair for far too long. Definitely no good for your health. It is recommended that u do 72 hours of charity..manning the dhow..fetching passengers to and fro from Bur Dubai to Deira.
2. Ranting about traffic is almost your daily fixture. For the next one week..u will take the public transport in Dubai. Hopefully, it will fix your short fuse and u will be more grateful.
3. It seems that the local papers are bad for you..probably reading too much between the lines agitate u. Thus u are banned from reading Emirates Today, KJ..etc for the next one month. Hopefully, u will step out and mingle with real people and bring back the creativity juice in you.
4. Hissing and cursing the weather is your favorite past time.Not as if you are labouring under the sun. You are probably hibernating in your cosy air con room sipping your favorite beverage. We are beginning to see signs of reptile behavoir in you...the hissing sound resembles a certain type of snake. Therefore, you will spend your summer july 2006 attached to a construction firm supervising a group of 100 workers for a prestigious project in Dubai...under the sun.The scales from your eyes will definitely drop off.
5. Forever, you are complaining about locals who are rude and stupid. To help you understand and have a better appreciation of your host country...u will be attached to an expert in the hair dance for one week..thereafter, you will perform at Deira City Centre. We hope this will help you to learn to laugh at your stupidity first.

Well, Im off to the loo..will continue the next 5 tomorrow.

Monday, December 19, 2005

The Accidental Tourist

"Each of us, regardless of where we are in the journey of life, are constantly moving somewhere, whether drifting off the path or moving ahead with our eyes firmly set on the final prize. Yet our journey, the adventure of life, is more than simply moving toward a destination, it’s a mindset about the journey itself."

The Accidental Tourist by Anne Tyler (one of most favorite writers..lots of quirky characters) tells the story of a travel writer,(in the movie played by William Hurts) who goes through life shielding himself from being affected by things.
Many of us, working or simply lured here by exotic tales in Dubai have the tendency to rant about anything under the sky ...the horrible traffic, the rude locals, the killing weather, the third world service,the smell,the unreasonable laws, the inefficient government agencies..etc I think we are missing a bigger picture of life...perhaps if we could.for once..just once..take a walk downtown..under the scourging sun..away from the comforts of an air-con environment..soak into the atmosphere of the Bastakiya by day..mingle with the crowd..enjoy a ride down the creek on a dhow..simple pleasure will do and believe me: YOU WILL NOT DIE! In fact, Im quite sure it will makes u a better being...a little bit more appreciative.
Maybe, u are really here by accident..what the heck..just make the bests of your stay here..u are in transit anyway..why be miserable?

Friday, December 16, 2005

Give Peace a Chance

The recent riots at Cronulla brought back many memories of my varsity days in Western Australia. The university prides itself as a research centre with strong multicutural ethos. I remember the Bush Court..the neutral ground where the colour of your skin, your religion, left or right, your sexual inclination, rich or issue at all! The yearly multicutural event was no farce..students from different nationalities came together to share their music, dance and the Bush Court. The only irritating visitors were the ferocious magpies..they wanted a share of your alfafa stacked
Yes..we had our fair share of unpleasant encounters with red neck aussies..."Hey..slanted eyes....go home!" We fought back.. "Fxxk your m... dxxkhead!"
Once, we were on the road..a cadillac passed by and suddenly a young redneck from within threw a can into our car and sped off..we gave chase and managed to stopped right in front of the cadillac..with baseball bats in our hands..there were four of us..they apologised. Period.'s not from the's the truth.
I still miss Australia..i have many friends there..including true blue aussies.
Germaine Greer, in a recent article for The Guardian made this contentious statement:
The "can-Australia-really-be-racist?" approach of the international media to reportage of the battle of Cronulla is gratuitous and silly. Australia is as racist as Britain, no more, no less.
Australian racism derives from the same bottomless source as racism elsewhere- from universal ignorance and working class frustration, reinforced by an unshakeable conviction of superiority over all other nations on earth, especially the swarthy ones.
The latest events might be no more than skirmishes in the usual beach wars. But it does seem that Australian-born Muslim teenagers have finally had enough.

If you can..make a trip down the open beach along belongs to everyone..caucasians, indians, filipinos, pakistanis...etc and they all have one objective in have a good time!

Australia..u are a big continent..have a big heart..give peace a chance!

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Mother and Child

My favorite spot at the Burjumun Mall is definitely the area decked with red and black designer sofa sets. You could take a breather after u have burst all your major credit cards on branded stuff. Above u, you could marvel at the blue Zodiac might ease your headache a bit, I guess. You could also enjoy watching beautiful emirati children having  a ball..running up and down..the spiral stairway.

I remember an interesting episode that happened not too long ago. A little emirati boy was running all over the place with his group of friends. Their laughter echoed the entire place. Then, in a surreal moment..a group of emirati their beautiful embroidered abayas (traditional dress) with shining beads at the helm levels and sleeves ends..and the shaylas (traditional veil) as well..descended down the spiral stairway. Instantaneously, the boy stopped his game and rushed towards them...AND instinctively, hugged one particular veiled woman. There were 7 of them..all veiled..yet he was able to recognise the mother! I smiled...the bond between a mother and a barriers could separate them. It must be universal.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Bosses from Hell Part 03

mmmmmmmmm Soul
Originally uploaded by Tie Dye Jedi.
He hit them with his helmet.. "Stupid!u understand english or not? one more mistake..i will send u back to India! u understand?" He is only a supervisor on site but like to boss around.In his 50s..again from a small island in the sun...crude, vulgar and I think..the real personification of EVIL. When he cannot get his message across..most of the times..he gets abusive..verbally and physically. His fellow comrade in crimes..from china..a fairly decent bloke was hailed once by the old toad for hitting a worker. Most of the workers from India do not speak english and they just bear with it for fear of losing their rice bowl.
Coming back to the old toad..he likes to brag about his pasts..not so glorious one. He was a pimp, loanshark, gambling den owner..etc his little island in the sun..was imprisoned for a couple of times. Once, he lamented to me.."I'm here in Dubai for almost 5 mths and I can't get a chicken (a term for hooker in his dialect)!" The main contractor wanted him out of the project many times..imcompetent performance..thank his lucky star..his immediate boss will always be there to cover up for him. Heard they are related.
Earlier this year..a group of 60 workers supplied by the local manpower actually walked out of him for a day..cross my heart..the old man wet his Subsequently, he apologised for his bad behavoir and promised to treat them with decency...not for long though.
Those local manpower suppliers knew his weaknesses..liquor, massage and women. So with a little sweetener in those areas...he treats their workers slightly better...again for a short while. During the hot months of July/August this year..he refused to let the workers have the two hours mandatory rest time until some of them threatened to report him.
With his unkempt look..the same long sleeved in day out..grey pants with the bottom ends tug into a pair of black socks..a Bob the Builder yellow helmet..and to top it all..a small schoolbag slings across his chest..he looks pathetic!

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Have a Kit Kat

My personal barber is on leave for 3 mths..back in Pakistan. He has not gone back for almost four years. Before he left..I sold him mine Sony Erisson T610 for 200,000 dhm (2 yr old)..not bad..and he must be pretty rich too.
Someone enquired about Sharjah on the message board. I do have several suppliers from there...normally it takes me an hour to reach Sharjah. In contrast, you don't see many spectacular landmarks, but in its own quiet way, Sharjah is quite charming. Furthermore, things are much cheaper than Dubai. If you are sourcing for 2nd hand items such as photo copier, furnitures..etc there are plenty to be found.
Once, I took an illegal taxi from Sharjah to Dubai...trying to save cost. It ended costing more and I had a spat with the nasty taxi driver too.Don't try it..not worth it unless you are Madam Julie Zhu from China.She has several businesses in Sharjah and travels to Dubai via taxi (legal and illegal)frequently. Once she had a big spat with a taxi driver in the middle of Bank St in Bur Dubai..she felt she was taken for a ride and refused to pay. Finally, the man in green arrived..our dear Mdm Julie Zhu transformed herself immediately into a helpless damsel in distress or puss in boots (as seen in Shrek 2)..eventually the taxi driver was reprimanded by the police and she left without paying a single cent. I was only a passer-by but thanks to her, i was dragged into the tussle to be her translator.
In Dubai, do be careful when you are travelling on the taxi alone. If you are a guy, of asian origin not take the front seat.To date, I have met syrian taxidriver, egyptian taxidriver, sri lankan, indian, pakistan..etc Mostly are friendly and it's not difficult to chat them up.However, I do find pakistani drivers, generally..are a bit over friendly toward guys..sexual innuendo is not uncommon..really. Once, this crazy crap told me he reads the palms and asked me to show mine..he grapped hold and said he likes my tanned skin.."very nice and smooth!" I nearly threw up..fortunately I uttered the phrase" Shalom ma akum..hello brother, im a muslim too" Instantly, he dropped the grip. For the rest of the journey, i prayed really hard and thank God..reached my destination safely.